Tag: shamanism

In a previous post (Energy & Healing: Beneficial or Bunk?), I discussed energy and my initial skepticism around its validity. I promised I’d share my experience and results in more detail later, so here it is.

I had a lot of negativities in my life.  More importantly, I never learned how to shake it off.  I never learned how to celebrate my victories or get over my failures. As a man, you’re only as good as your last f*ck-up, no matter how big or small, perceived or real.  Carrying that kind of baggage over a lifetime is like death by 1000 cuts; each cut is tiny, but they add up to a ton of negative energy accumulated and firmly implanted within the psyche.

In previous posts, I’ve detailed my difficulty with some of the basics like meditation, inner peace, and clarity. In the beginning, I was thirsting for inner peace and knowledge of the universe. I intuitively knew what we have been taught in school and church (mosque, temple, etc.) was both intellectually and spiritually limiting, often by design. But I couldn’t get a foothold on learning anything and practicing mindfulness until I found a way to calm my mind and release all that negative energy…Until my wife and I met a friend who was just returning to Shamanism after a few years hiatus.

The shamanic healer had indicated she was wanting to return to Shamanism and needed some volunteers for her to practice her shamanic-based energy healing.  Of course, I eagerly volunteered. I’m always up for something new and different, even if I think it won’t work.  What could it hurt to try it? So, one evening, she and her husband came for dinner and afterward, she began.

She had me stand in the middle of my wife’s altar room, arms at my side and as relaxed as possible. I closed my eyes for focus and did my best to clear my mind. She used a Native American style rattle she had constructed and a feather, which she used to distribute the wispy smoke from her sage around me to cleanse my negative energy, just as you would use to cleanse a house or object. I focused on the rattle as she waved her hands around me as if to physically pull the negativity from me. At first, I really felt nothing….and maybe a bit silly being the center of attention. Then, I heard my wife say, “Tell him to open his mouth” and I did. I began to relax and then feel a bit light-headed. After a few minutes, she said in almost a whisper, “Ok.  All done.”

I can only describe the feeling as being a little tipsy.  Sort of lightheaded, and a little dizzy. My wife, who is very gifted, said she saw a tangible dark shadow everywhere the healer’s hands swept over and away from my body. It was like the negativity was being pulled away.  However, it initially just snapped back. I apparently could not let go of the negativity that had become such a part of me over my lifetime.  It was at that moment when my wife intuitively told our shamanic healer to have me open my mouth.  Through my open mouth, my wife said she saw the darkness/negativity pour out of my mouth and dissipate into the air with little resistance.  In the horror movies, that would be the ‘demonic entity’ leaving my body just prior to rolling the ending credits and music at the end of a silly Tubi movie. But this was not some mythological ‘demonic’ entity. It was a physical manifestation of years of negative energy, and it was real. I felt the negative energy leaving my body, though I didn’t comprehend that initially. I couldn’t rationalize it then, but things had changed for the better in a matter of minutes.

I started guided meditations, something I couldn’t do prior. I found my moods being generally positive and things that would bother me did so at a nearly insignificant level. I followed up twice more with our shamanic healer.  The second session had whisps of grey smoke pulled out of me with ease, so as a result, I maintained my calmness and got deeper into meditation.  I had found a lot of hope, optimism, and excitement. The third session, however, was the one that blew my mind.

The third session was requested by me because it had been a few weeks, and I was struggling a little with some of the meditation.  I felt I was stuck with little new progress.  This took place at her home, again with her husband and my wife watching.  I stood in her kitchen, and she went through the same process.  When it was over, I looked at her husband and immediately noticed he had a wide-eyed shocked look on his face. I immediately glanced at my wife, and she was smiling a knowing smile. The shamanic healer’s husband blurted out “Did you see that???” He and my wife described what they both saw in unison as I stood there, completely dumbfounded at their observations.

As the healer did her thing, my wife and her husband witness what they described as a white shape, my size, pulled away from my body and turned to face me, forming a translucent mirror image.  They said the ‘spirit-like’ image of me stared directly back at my physical body for a few seconds, completely motionless, before returning to my physical form. Upon being told this, I was of course puzzled and asked a little nervously “What does that mean???”

I don’t think anyone really knew at the moment, but I think it’s related to Shadow Work. Specifically, self-reflection, growth and spiritual expansion.

Here’s my take on it:

Self-Reflection and Awareness:

• The mirror image is likely a symbol of self-awareness. It encourages you to examine your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that may be hidden from your consciousness. It may encourage examination of the things you dislike or are uncomfortable with about yourself. Eventually, this may lead to self-compassion and understanding of your inner shadow-self. Shamanic healing involves exploring your shadow self which tends to repress parts of the personality that can be the nucleus of negativity, pain, or other unresolved trauma. It may represent the projection of these aspects of your psyche onto others but can also encourage self-reflection. By acknowledging and integrating your shadow-self, you can become whole and ultimately reach self-acceptance. 

Growth and Healing:

• Seeing your reflection during healing work is indicates understanding and healing.  It can help you identify patterns of behavior and emotional responses that are ultimately roadblocks in obtaining inner peace. By Acknowledging your shadow-self, you can break free from negative patterns and move towards spiritual growth and healing. 

Spiritual Expansion:

• Seeing your mirror image can also be a sign of spiritual expansion. It may mean you are opening yourself up to new awareness and understanding, leading to deeper connection with your inner self. 

To be completely transparent, I had my eyes closed and didn’t see my ‘other self’.  I recall being in trance-like state, aware but not feeling, if that makes sense.  I don’t think it was any kind of astral projection, so I’m at a loss as to what really happened beyond what I theorized above. I just know it was the last session, and the overall experience jump-started my being able to meditate, heal from the past, forgive myself & others, and gain optimism for achieving inner peace.

Finally, before anyone asks, I don’t know how this compares to Reiki healing because I’ve never experienced Reiki. I won’t compare the two because that would be disingenuous, and these posts are intended to be about real experiences. I encourage anyone reading this to comment their experiences with Reiki and other healing arts, especially calling out any significant differences from what I experienced. 

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